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books 02/03/09

The Husband Project Day 3: Physical Touch

Project #3
A Little Hands-on Attention
Meeting Your Husband’s Physical (Touch) Needs

“When you touch a body, you touch the whole person, the intellect, the spirit, and the emotions.” - Jane Harrington

“He who feels it, knows it more.” - Bob Marley

Your Project:
Do something to help your husband enjoy physical touch. Find something that will help him relax. New pillows, massage lotions, a back rub…your choice. Make it something that both of you will enjoy.
 
What does your husband consider relaxing?
 
Here’s the project where you get to choose between Thai, Indian, and Moroccan, learn about choosing and blending oils, and get elbow-deep in the technique of kneading. Nope – it’s not watching the Food Chanel together – it’s all about massage.
 
Remember when you were dating how hard it was to practice self-control? Fortunately, Roger and I had excellent chaperones while we were engaged (four teenage kids). I remember thinking, “I cannot wait to be married so we can actually be alone and do all this hugging and kissing and…”
 
After a few years of marriage, however, I seem to have developed excellent self-control.
 
If I had to pick one love language for my husband, it would definitely be physical touch. He loves the feel of my hands on the back of his neck, wants to sit oh-so-close on the couch, and practically sits up and pants if I offer to scratch his back.

Tonight is the night to make sure that you man’s physical touch needs are met. Break out the massage lotion and make sure that your husband experiences some physical touch.

Getting Creative

  • I’m way more inspired to do this project when I’ve just purchased a new lotion or massage oil. Run to the mall and buy a jar of “inspiration.”
  • Do you feel stymied because you know your husband would love a massage, but you have no idea how to do it?   You can pick up a book, or better yet, ask him to show you what would feel best. There’s nothing better than a little hands-on instruction.

Project Reports – What Other Women Have Done

“When we were dating I used to give my husband foot massages regularly. He kept saying 'When we get married this will all stop.' Not right after we were married but about a year down the road he was right – they became few and far between. Guess it’s time to give him a nice long foot massage! I think I will add that into my weekly schedule.” - Denise

“I love this.  Not being a "touch" sort of person myself, I realize this is an area I’ve (selfishly?) neglected.  I happen to have just a little something tucked away from the last time I got inspired.  Going to dust the bottle off, take a shower, invite my playmate to bed...” - Angie

“My husband has a lot of problems with his sinuses. So as we were relaxing, I had him rest his head in my lap and rubbed his head for him.” - LJ

As the author of 'The Husband Project' Kathi Lipp speaks to groups across the country on how to put your marriage on Project Status.

Find out more about Kathi and the Husband Project Seminar at www.the husbandproject.org.

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