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Who Tiffany Really Is

CBN.com Renelle Roberts [reporting]: Divorce is a heartbreaking event for any family. For Tiffany Flock, it was the spark that led her into rebellion.

Tiffany Flock: I was a daddy’s girl, so when my dad had to leave the home, I was just crushed. Right after that my mom started dating other men. I remember seeing her hold another guy’s hand, and I just went outside screaming. It was so horrible.

Roberts [reporting]: By age 12, Tiffany began to hang out with much older friends. First, they enticed her to drink, then use drugs. Finally, they dared her to have sex.

Flock: Here I am, 12 years old, and it was a dare from my friend. I was like, “Okay. Everyone else is doing it. So, why not?” That’s where it started.

Roberts [reporting]: For the next several years, Tiffany partied to forget about deal with her anger and insecurity over the divorce. By age 15, she was pregnant.
Flock: I was like, “Oh gosh, I’m pregnant.” A lot of my friends were getting pregnant at that time.

Roberts: Did you have plans to carry out the pregnancy?

Flock: At first [I did]. Just to be rebellious toward my mom. She and I were in a fight on the phone, and I was like, “Well guess what? I’m pregnant!” She just flipped out, “You’re 15.  What are we going to do?”

Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany decided she wasn’t ready to be a mother. Her parents took her to a clinic to have an abortion.

Flock: It was afterward that I ended up in the back seat of the car screaming at the top of my lungs because I was in pain. It was traumatic. I didn’t really understand what I just went through and what I had just done.

Roberts [reporting]: Two years later, Tiffany was pregnant again.

Flock: I had been being promiscuous sleeping with a few different guys.

Roberts: From that time period of 15-17, was there any fear that, “I was pregnant at 15; I hope this doesn’t happen again?”

Flock: No. When it happened again, I was like, “Well, I can’t have a baby, so I’m just going to go to the clinic.”

Roberts [reporting]: She didn’t tell her parents. This time, she and her boyfriend went to the abortion clinic to end her pregnancy.

Flock: I started having intense pain. I couldn’t even work. I was doubled over. My mom took me to the doctor, and we found out that there was fetal matter still in me. The baby’s arms or legs were still in me.

Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany’s pregnancy had been too far along for the type of abortion that was performed, so she had to undergo surgery to complete the botched abortion. The scene played itself out a third time two years later. Tiffany, now 19, was still on drugs and headed for her third abortion.

Flock: The other two times I had been asleep for the procedure, but this time I was awake. I can remember hearing everything. That was the most traumatic experience of my whole life. I just remember hearing this vacuum and feeling like my insides were being ripped out of me. I started screaming, and the doctor said, “Be quiet! The girls in the other room can hear you!”

Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany and her boyfriend eventually broke up, and she was back on the hunt for another man to fill her void.

Roberts: During those years, what is it that you were searching for?

Flock: Love from anything that would give me love. I thought sex was showing me love, but really it was ripping my heart out and tearing my soul apart.

Roberts [reporting]: When a friend invited Tiffany to his church’s singles group, she took him up on the offer, even though she considered herself anything but a “church kid.”

Flock: It was just a bunch of single 20somethings having a good time worshiping the Lord, and I liked it. I felt free there.

Roberts [reporting]: She decided to visit the Sunday service. That morning, a major change took place in her heart.

Flock: I accepted Jesus right then, and I just started crying! It was like I finally was “saved.” I knew that I had to follow the Lord, but it was the most difficult season of my life because the longer I was sober, the longer I had to deal with who Tiffany really was. I can remember being in bed weeping like a little girl, balled up. I had my grandmother on the phone, and she would say, “Tiffany, whatever you do, just don’t give up.” I felt so lonely but it forced me into reading the Bible.

Roberts [reporting]: As Tiffany studied her Bible, she realized the gravity of her three abortions. A flood of emotions swept over her one Sunday in church.

Flock: At that moment, I just broke. I was like, “I murdered three children!” I just got hit in the head with a brick. I just lost it. I started asking the Lord to forgive me. It was a reality of what I had done. Those three lives and their destinies would never come forth. I did struggle with guilt for a season of my life, until the Lord set me free from that. Now it just pushes me into intercession for life…that people would choose life instead of death. 

Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany found someone to share her life with. She and her husband Nathanael are expecting their first child.

Flock: I have the most amazing husband ever! Before it was just, me wanting to fulfill a need to be wanted or loved. Now, I realize that Jesus loves me, and Nathanael’s love is just a gift. I’m not seeking after him to love me.

Roberts: What are your hopes for your baby?

Flock: That it would be everything that God plans it to be. I want the fullness of its destiny to come forth. Since I’ve become a Christian, I’ve found the love that I’ve been searching for. There’s just a peace about me knowing that the Lord loves me. His Word is a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path, and I just feel that every day as I walk.

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Transcript

Renelle Roberts [reporting]: Divorce is a heartbreaking event for any family. For Tiffany Flock, it was the spark that led her into rebellion. Tiffany Flock: I was a daddy’s girl, so when my dad had to leave the home, I was just crushed. Right after that my mom started dating other men. I remember seeing her hold another guy’s hand, and I just went outside screaming. It was so horrible. Roberts [reporting]: By age 12, Tiffany began to hang out with much older friends. First, they enticed her to drink, then use drugs. Finally, they dared her to have sex. Flock: Here I am, 12 years old, and it was a dare from my friend. I was like, “Okay. Everyone else is doing it. So, why not?” That’s where it started. Roberts [reporting]: For the next several years, Tiffany partied to forget about deal with her anger and insecurity over the divorce. By age 15, she was pregnant. Flock: I was like, “Oh gosh, I’m pregnant.” A lot of my friends were getting pregnant at that time. Roberts: Did you have plans to carry out the pregnancy? Flock: At first [I did]. Just to be rebellious toward my mom. She and I were in a fight on the phone, and I was like, “Well guess what? I’m pregnant!” She just flipped out, “You’re 15. What are we going to do?” Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany decided she wasn’t ready to be a mother. Her parents took her to a clinic to have an abortion. Flock: It was afterward that I ended up in the back seat of the car screaming at the top of my lungs because I was in pain. It was traumatic. I didn’t really understand what I just went through and what I had just done. Roberts [reporting]: Two years later, Tiffany was pregnant again. Flock: I had been being promiscuous sleeping with a few different guys. Roberts: From that time period of 15-17, was there any fear that, “I was pregnant at 15; I hope this doesn’t happen again?” Flock: No. When it happened again, I was like, “Well, I can’t have a baby, so I’m just going to go to the clinic.” Roberts [reporting]: She didn’t tell her parents. This time, she and her boyfriend went to the abortion clinic to end her pregnancy. Flock: I started having intense pain. I couldn’t even work. I was doubled over. My mom took me to the doctor, and we found out that there was fetal matter still in me. The baby’s arms or legs were still in me. Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany’s pregnancy had been too far along for the type of abortion that was performed, so she had to undergo surgery to complete the botched abortion. The scene played itself out a third time two years later. Tiffany, now 19, was still on drugs and headed for her third abortion. Flock: The other two times I had been asleep for the procedure, but this time I was awake. I can remember hearing everything. That was the most traumatic experience of my whole life. I just remember hearing this vacuum and feeling like my insides were being ripped out of me. I started screaming, and the doctor said, “Be quiet! The girls in the other room can hear you!” Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany and her boyfriend eventually broke up, and she was back on the hunt for another man to fill her void. Roberts: During those years, what is it that you were searching for? Flock: Love from anything that would give me love. I thought sex was showing me love, but really it was ripping my heart out and tearing my soul apart. Roberts [reporting]: When a friend invited Tiffany to his church’s singles group, she took him up on the offer, even though she considered herself anything but a “church kid.” Flock: It was just a bunch of single 20somethings having a good time worshiping the Lord, and I liked it. I felt free there. Roberts [reporting]: She decided to visit the Sunday service. That morning, a major change took place in her heart. Flock: I accepted Jesus right then, and I just started crying! It was like I finally was “saved.” I knew that I had to follow the Lord, but it was the most difficult season of my life because the longer I was sober, the longer I had to deal with who Tiffany really was. I can remember being in bed weeping like a little girl, balled up. I had my grandmother on the phone, and she would say, “Tiffany, whatever you do, just don’t give up.” I felt so lonely but it forced me into reading the Bible. Roberts [reporting]: As Tiffany studied her Bible, she realized the gravity of her three abortions. A flood of emotions swept over her one Sunday in church. Flock: At that moment, I just broke. I was like, “I murdered three children!” I just got hit in the head with a brick. I just lost it. I started asking the Lord to forgive me. It was a reality of what I had done. Those three lives and their destinies would never come forth. I did struggle with guilt for a season of my life, until the Lord set me free from that. Now it just pushes me into intercession for life…that people would choose life instead of death. Roberts [reporting]: Tiffany found someone to share her life with. She and her husband Nathanael are expecting their first child. Flock: I have the most amazing husband ever! Before it was just, me wanting to fulfill a need to be wanted or loved. Now, I realize that Jesus loves me, and Nathanael’s love is just a gift. I’m not seeking after him to love me. Roberts: What are your hopes for your baby? Flock: That it would be everything that God plans it to be. I want the fullness of its destiny to come forth. Since I’ve become a Christian, I’ve found the love that I’ve been searching for. There’s just a peace about me knowing that the Lord loves me. His Word is a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path, and I just feel that every day as I walk.

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