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Former ‘Madame’ Now Delivered and Free!

Pamela says, “My madame name was Geor-gee-ia or Queen Pam and I had a lot of women that worked for me in different areas of the town. I had a very large home, a Hummer in the drive, two other vehicles, and always had a lot of money. It was a very big business."

It’s not hard to imagine how a small-town girl like Pamela Hillman would land in the world of prostitution and drugs. Her biological dad was an abusive alcoholic. Her mom was a free-spirited playboy bunny. But it was what happened when she was five that started Pamela on her destructive path. She had found a stray puppy in her backyard she wanted to rescue.

Pamela remembers, “So I tie him up to the fence and my dad comes to the door and he says, ‘What are you doing?’ And I said, ‘Please, please can I have the puppy?’ And he said, ‘Come upstairs with me and you can have him.’”

Then he molested her. 

“Something happened that day,” Pamela shares. “It planted the seed that I could get what I want by going upstairs.”

Pamela told her mother who kicked her father out. But the molestation continued as two other family members picked up where he left off. Just 9 years old, she started smoking marijuana she found lying around the house.

Pamela says, “When I discovered pot, I just went somewhere else. I felt free from being trapped in that bedroom.”

Throughout her teens Pamela turned to harder drugs and eventually cocaine to escape. But it was sex that would give her a temporary fix for her need to be loved. By her 20’s she had married 3 times and had turned to prostitution. Her clients and the men in her life confirmed what she already believed.

Pamela shares, “I was a whore, I was a slut, I was never going to amount to anything, I was shameful. That was all that I knew was filth.”

But there was another voice from her childhood fighting to get through that told her a different story. It came from a friend of her grandmothers.

Pamela recalls, “He says, ‘This one here's special. She's going to do great things for God one day.’ I continually heard it throughout my life of destructive behaviors.”

Those words would one day help save Pamela’s life. She was 26 and with a needle in hand, ready to inject a lethal overdose of cocaine into her veins.

Pamela remembers, “And I had said a prayer before I did it, ‘God, if you're real, help me, rescue me. I need you.’ I heard that voice again ‘You don't belong here. You're going to do great things for God.’ And I heard my grandmother's voice. I heard so many of her prayers in that moment.”

She abandoned the suicide, got into rehab, and for two years went to church and made a decision to follow Christ. She also refrained from drugs and sex. But just one moment of weakness took her back to a life – and hurt – she thought she had left behind.

Pamela shares, “And once I slept with a man it trigged something in me. I would relapse because I couldn't deal with that shame and guilt again. I was unworthy to be in His presence, to be a child of God.”

That would send Pamela into a 25-year slide that led to drugs, prostitution, and numerous stints in jail. Living just outside of Atlanta, she also became a very successful drug dealer and madame. And in her mind, it was justified.

Pamela says, “I knew how to make more money in that industry. That was the big money. I felt I was really doing these girls a favor in pulling them out of these pimps for little of nothing dollars and getting thousands of dollars from these big businessmen.”

Still she knew there was a better way. But the trap she had fallen into wasn’t about to let her go.

Pam says, “I didn't want to be doing this. I didn't want to be selling my soul to the devil. But I didn't know how to get out.”

Then in 2010, Pamela was busted for possession and sentenced to five years in prison. The first thing she requested was a bible. In her cell, she re-dedicated her life to Christ. She says over time, God removed her desires to indulge in the vices of her past.

Pam shares, “I had to repent of all the prostitution, all the madame, causing somebody else to sin; the using this body, putting these drugs in. He filled me with his power, with His essence, with His love, the liquid love I can't describe it any other way. God became the father I was looking for all along. And there's no man that can fill the void that Father God can fill.”

Pamela also forgave her abusers.

Pam says, “And I released them to him. And He not only healed my heart, but He healed the hearts of those, the offenders that I was praying for and brought them to Christ.”

Pamela started a scripture reading ministry where she shared the delivering power of Jesus Christ with other inmates. After serving just 18 months she was released on November 18th, 2011.

Pamela shares, “I knew my purpose was now to go out and to help the disenfranchised, to help the less fortunate, to help those who are lost and forgotten in the prison walls.”

Pamela now runs life changers legacy, a ministry where she mentors hundreds of men and women through a curriculum she developed called, ‘I see me free.’ She’s also married to Os. Since 2010 she’s celebrated the anniversary of her freedom from addiction.”

Pam says, “It doesn't matter what you've been through in life. There is a way out and it is Jesus. Allow him to minister that beautiful healing and to guide you into the purpose He has for your life.”

For more information: 

Pamela Hillman
LifeChangers Legacy Ministries
5665 Atlanta Hwy 
Ste 102-217
Alpharetta, GA 30004

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