Why Does It Seem No One is on My Side — Not Even God?

Ever feel there’s no one on your side—that even God has turned his back to you? Have loneliness, frustration, and fear taken control of your thoughts? And maybe you feel your prayers have gone unanswered, that your pain is too much to bear, or even that you’re undeserving of God’s love for you.  

It’s difficult, but very important, to distinguish between feelings and reality.  It’s true that people will let you down, hurt your feelings, and even turn against you. That’s because you live in an imperfect, sinful world. Although you may perceive God has turned his back to you too, that’s impossible. His true Word, the Bible, holds this promise, “The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." (Deuteronomy 31:8) And God cannot lie (you’ll find that truth in Titus 1:2 and Hebrews 6:18).

God will at times seem distant and quiet, but, in His wisdom, He can use that to draw you closer to Him. Do you seek him out at those times? Is it possible you feel God isn’t by your side because you have turned your back on or walked away from Him?

Throughout the Bible, God’s people shared the same kind of feelings. Those who wrote the Bible’s Psalms cried openly and unashamedly that God and others had walked away.  The Psalm writers and many others boldly shared their frustrations with God. But they knew in their hearts they could trust God’s promises and rejoice in his presence. While they felt uncertain, lonely, and frustrated, they also knew without doubt that God was on their side and His love for them had not ended. God remained on their side, and you can rest assured He is also on yours.

You may appreciate one psalmist’s words, “Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me.” (Psalms 27:10) Even if his own parents’ love failed him, he knew with certainty the Lord would not.

These suggestions may help you deal with your feelings: 

• As best possible, strive to spend time with caring, accepting, and joyful people. It’s easy to feel isolated when hanging around people who are uncaring, negative, and/or mean-spirited. 

• Examine your life and consider if it’s possible that your actions or words might put people off, offend them, or give them the impression you don’t need their support? 

• Seek out a Christ-centered, Bible-based church to attend. Certainly Christians aren’t perfect, but they are forgiven and strive to have compassionate hearts, like Jesus. If a caring person you know is active in a church, ask him or her about their church and their faith. Consider visiting that church. You may want to talk to the pastor after the service about your current feelings and fears.

• Purchase (or borrow) a Bible. Make sure  the version you select is written in a style you understand. If you visit a Christian bookstore, ask an employee for help in choosing one. Become friends with the psalms. You’ll find them near the middle of the Bible. You may want to begin by reading Psalms 13 (below) and 27, which put words to your feelings while pointing you to your Savior and constant friend. He will not and cannot turn His back on you. He loves you like you’ve never been loved before!

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Psalm 13  

How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
                        How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
                        and every day have sorrow in my heart?
            How long will my enemy triumph over me?
Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;
my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
            and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
But I trust in your unfailing love;
                        my heart rejoices in your salvation.
 I will sing to the LORD,
                        for he has been good to me.